The end of a marriage is a challenging and uncertain phase of a person’s life. For people experiencing separation and divorce, the holiday season from Thanksgiving through the end of the year may intensify the many different emotions that divorce brings. The holidays bring parties and family gatherings—leading to social interactions when you aren’t at your best, unsolicited opportunities to feel judged by others, repeated questions requiring you to explain your situation, or, people being awkwardly silent around you. To make matters worse, you may not be with your children during the holidays for the first time, and you are served perpetual reminders of how much things have changed..
On a brighter note, the New Year immediately follows the holidays, which can be an opportunity to shift your mindset into a better space and to set the tone for your upcoming year. At New Direction Family Law, we cannot encourage you enough to embrace the New Year as an opportunity to take positive steps into your future.
- Experience your life. It is natural to become more introverted when your marriage ends. However, this is also a chance to find activities and interests that YOU love, and that don’t revolve around a spouse or children. For the first time in a long time, you can join a MeetUp group that interests you, take those photography classes you always put off or recruit a friend and go on a road trip.
- Establish attainable resolutions. An almost cliché aspect of New Year’s are “resolutions”, which have become so commercialized that every gym in America offers discounted long-term memberships and every retailer seems to have an endless supply of yoga and workout clothes. Instead of getting caught up with unrealistic or expensive expectations, try to set a few simple goals for yourself. Examples are to consume fewer sugary drinks, to take the stairs whenever possible, and to plan a social opportunity for yourself once a week.
- Maintain your boundaries. Your intimate relationship with your former partner is over and you deserve some space. To the extent possible, limit the terms and times of your communication with your former partner. Further, set limits on your social media time, block the people who do not assist in your healing journey, or edit your feed so that you don’t always see upsetting photos and updates.
- Discover healthy coping behaviors. The end of a marriage is a trauma, which causes people to use every coping mechanism they have access to. Some of these mechanisms can be unhealthy, like using controlled substances, alcohol, sex, or food to cope with intense feelings. A therapist or support group can help inspire talking through issues, or finding other activities and methods that allow for a healthier release.
Let New Direction Family Law Assist You
If you are considering divorce, contact New Direction Family Law. Divorce is a major life decision which should not be taken lightly. Our attorneys have decades of combined legal experience and will provide you with relevant, accurate, custom tailored legal advice. You have important legal rights, and we want to give you the tools to make smart, confident decisions about your future. We proudly serve women and men in Wake, Johnston, Durham, and surrounding counties. Contact New Direction Family Law at (919) 719-3470 to schedule an appointment, or visit us at our website.
