Being a parent is hard. Even the best parent finds themselves in situations where they have regrets. Or at the very least, they say or do something to their child and wonder: where on Earth did that come from? For the good and bad we bring into our roles as parents, a big part how we act and react is informed by our childhood experiences. Consider the following aspects of your childhood:
Relationships. From the time we are children, we model our interpersonal interactions and relationships on what we see from our parents, from family, from parents of friends, and even on television. Therefore, what we saw can be incredibly powerful, even if we don’t realize it as adults. For example, if we see our parents treat each other with mutual respect, then we have a frame of reference to seek out people who can provide a similar experience for us. In contrast, children who witness domestic violence are more likely to enter into violent relationships when they are adults.
Coping. Learning to cope with your feelings in a healthy manner is a critical life skill, one that can help you avoid addictions and self-harming behaviors in the future. The way that you were taught to cope with anxiety, anger, and sadness by your parents and parental figures can help you understand yourself, and in turn, how you teach your children to cope.
Trauma. Physical, sexual, or emotional abuse, abandonment, or neglect are childhood traumas that can have life-long detrimental impacts. Not only do these negative experiences shape the way we understand the world, but can result in a lack of trust, an inability to identify unhealthy relationships, a potential to become an abuser, anger management issues, an inability to cope, or mental health disorders. It is so important to get the help you deserve so that you can learn how these experiences affected you, how they may affect your parenting, and how you can move forward in a healthy way.
Let New Direction Family Law Assist You
Child custody disputes are hard on you and hard on your children. At New Direction Family Law, we understand this and will treat you with the compassion and respect you deserve. Your future is important to us and we will work hard to make sure your voice is clearly heard. Contact us if you need help. Our office serves clients in Wake, Johnston, Durham and surrounding counties. Call New Direction Family Law at (919) 719-3470 to schedule a consultation or visit us online at our website.
Carly G. Baker
New Direction Family Law