Keeping Your Children Out of the Middle of a Custody Dispute

In Child Custody by Sarah Hink

You adore your children and so does their other parent. Unfortunately, when the two of you are no longer a couple, there can be a great big divide between what you both believe is best for the children. Whether you split up a week ago or years ago, your children love both their parents and are doing their best to cope. They need you at your best and to be kept out of the middle of your custody dispute.

Keeping Your Children Out of the Middle

  1. Take responsibility for how you choose to interact with your former partner. Regardless of why your relationship ended and how your spouse chooses to behave, you have control over your own conduct and your reactions. Your children will always remember this time period of their lives and it is important to be mindful of the short and long term consequences of your words and actions.

  2. Create boundaries. If you are unable to communicate or co-parent peaceably, then find a way to have healthy boundaries. This may include utilizing a professional child visitation service or a responsible adult to help supervise or transition visits so you do not have to directly interact with the other parent. In addition, any plan needs to include your phone, text, and social media activity.

  3. Don’t try to turn your children against their other parent. It is in your child’s interest to have a continued, healthy relationship with both parents. Appreciating this truly serves your children’s emotional and developmental needs.

  4. Speak with a lawyer to explore reaching an agreement. While courts can certainly consider the expressed desires of older children when it comes to custody and visitation issues, it is best for children to never be put in the position of having to choose a side. An agreement is an amicable way of resolving child custody issues outside of a courtroom.

  5. Stick to your agreements and orders. Your children need normalcy and consistency. They will not get that if you act unpredictably or unexpectedly. In addition, courts do not look fondly on people who violate orders or agreements and violating an order or agreement may have a negative impact on your time with your children.

Let New Direction Family Law Assist You

New Direction Family Law provides legal representation to people who want to resolve child custody issues. Whether this is the first time you are formally addressing child custody and visitation, or whether you seek to modify an existing order, we can help. Our attorneys have decades of combined experience, which we use to provide compassionate and effective representation to our clients. We proudly serve clients in Wake, Johnston, Durham, and surrounding counties. You can reach New Direction Family Law at (919) 719-3470 to schedule an appointment, or visit us at our website.